Eartha Kitt

has passed.

::sigh:: too much awesomeness has left

A new face on my radar

I love Susie Bright.

I have just discovered her.  She showed up in two posts at two websites I follow in the same day.  The first: her essay Egg Sex was linked to in the comments of a story Feministing discussed.  The second: She was a guest blogger on BoingBoing.  That there clinched the deal.  Not only was she able to write such awesome, open essays of gender liberation and exploration that were tempered with experience, but in my mind which constantly weighs independent critical thinking with validation through peer review, here she hit on the big one... right into the left field I tend to hang out in.

Since then, I have added her to my RSS feeder and have been pouring through her blog.  She comments on movies, technology, sex, eroticism, and rights.  It is.... ::shiver:: orgasmic.  It's revolutionary, strengthening, funny, and provacative.  Read it!

Claire's Party

Before I start:

1) HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAVE!

2)Orion just found the cap to my mouse.  That is... she knocked over my mouse and the cap came off.  Neci likes feathers, Orion likes psuedo-cylindrical clear things.  Therefor, Orion is currently pouncing all over my bed room.  It's adorable.

Now, onto Claire's party.

Claire's party was awesome! There were so many people there that half the party had to eat dinner at the bar!!  I go there before Claire and her mom and husband and his family showed up.  Remember, as this flavors the rest of the night: Claire's brother-in-law is Aaron.  You know, the one I had the not-quite-stable-or-amicable break up with.  The one who broke up with me then proceded to continually show up at my house and freak me out.  The one who sent me all sorts of weird emails saying that we needed to get together to talk some things out.  You know, that one.

Well, apparently he wasn't told I would be there.  So when he showed up at the restaurant, I got the EVAL GLARE OF DETH!  Fortunately he showed up with his family, so his sister and her boyfriend sat next to me, and then his father,  he on the other side of all of them.  That way we didn't need to talk or see each other.  His sister and i talked about college and boyfriends and anime and all sorts of things.  Aaron came up a few times as she had heard bits of stories and needed clarification.  There was a dude named Scott sitting across the table from us, another person from Cookeville, who we talked with alot.  Everyone asked me why I didn't bring my boyfriend (he came up after "OOH! I LOVE YOUR HAIR!" "Thanks! It was a Xmas gift from my boyfriend!"  I had to respond that I didn't want to start any issues as Aaron and I had a not-good breakup and it's Claire's birthday and we're having fun! goddammit!!

So then we go bowling.  i'm on a lane with Claire, Nathen, Scott, and someone else whose name starts with C.  We're sandwitched between the other lanes, so Aaron and I are sometimes up at the same time.  No big deal, no eye contact, no issue.  Suddenly Scott gets up, he had been sitting next to me and we discussed all sorts of dorky things (like WoW).  And then Aaron comes over...
"Elizabeth?"  I'm surprised that he's talking to me somewhat, but I don't want to seem unfriendly and be the catalyst for a scene.
"Hey! Yeah?"
"I think that sometime we need to talk."
"About what?"  If he has something he wants to talk about, an actual topic, I can be reasonable and nice.  However if he just wants to attempt to draw out the past and defend his actions then I don't want to even give him my time.
"The past."
"I don't think there's anything to talk about. It's over."
"I still think we need to sit down and talk."
"no. We're here for Claire's birthday. We should be having fun."
"I'm not saying right now. And I'm having a blast.  But we need to talk."
"Just go, please."

At that point, the easygoing, noworry feeling I managed to have that eveing , the feeling that we were just going to realize that things didn't work out, and to not antagonize each other was gone.  He's still having issues.

Does this mean he's going to start back with the whole creepy email thing?  Will he again show up at my house unannounced and unwanted?

Why can't he get over this. 

I'm done with it.


I don't think the human mind can comprehend the past and the future.  They are both just illusions that can manipulate you in to thinking there's some kind of change.
-Bob Dylan

Claire's Birthday

I had book-club last night, and Claire gave me the plans for her birthday.  Four days ago, I was at Borders and saw a book that I had to remember to mention for her, but now that I'm going to the bday I wanted to get it.  It was sooo PERFECT!  I go back today and it's sold out.  And at B&N and everywhere!!!  Argh!

It's ok... I have a backup plan.

Inspired by Myspace SexxyPix

I see so many attempts as "sexy" myspace pictures that seem to serve no purpose other than to debase the page owner by proving that they need to seek acceptance by others, not themselves.  And I finally exclaimed my annoyance at them to Morgan.

"Don't they realize that in trying to be sexy, it's just becoming grotesque? It's not sexy.  It's fake.  Sexy is what you are, not what you try to be."

And then I pulled out one of my favorite poems.  I think about it often, as like the author I'm not fashion model.  But I'm me and there is so much about me that I love and even that others find attractive.  I mean, how many women have a boy come up to her in a bar and say "I'm not trying to be creepy, but you're absolutely beautiful."?  So internally and externally... I must be doing something right.

So I'm reprinting Maya Angelou's Phenomenal Woman.

Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
 

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
the swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
 

Men themselves have wondered
what they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
 

Now you understand
just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
the need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

this week...

So, Blogojavich shakes down childrens hospitals.  Bush gets shoes thrown at him. 

My brother's car is in an accident.  Morgan's transmission explodes.

My kittens are cuddly.  And I was harassed at WalMart.

"Corruption and hypocrisy ought not to be inevitable products of democracy, as they undoubtedly are today" - Mahatma Ghandi

The cats go to the vet on Monday

Neci and Orion are set to go to the vet's on Monday for their yearly shots.  Apparently Orion's were due in November, which makes sense now that I think of it.  Neci's were done last December because I adopted her later.  This is all in preparation for Orion's spaying on January 14.  No more will my kitten go into heat.  Her last heat, however, has been a while ago. Maybe she's gotten used to the odd feeling of fertility.

So before I bring the cats in, I want to make sure they look their best: claws trimmed, coats shiney, all cuddly.  So I started with the coats.  Next time, I need to remember to trim their claws *before* I give them their bath.  Orion was ok like normal, but Neci has gotten to hate baths more and more.  Just getting into the bathroom was a difficult experiance.  I think I need to do hers before Orion. 

I wish I knew where my camera was (again) because then I could include pictures of them in their shrunken state.


--
-Eliz"D2 92 F9 F2 A2 A5 1D E8 96 51 F9 14 16 46 C9 26"abeth

The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now. - Thich Nhat Hanh

The whole moon and the entire sky are reflected in one dewdrop on the grass. - Dogen

I've Joined the Herd

So, I have another nerd confession to make.

another? what's left for you to do?

I... I...

come on, tell us...

I now play World of Warcraft.

You what?

Come on now, it's not that bad.  I have a level 24 human palidan, a level 20 dwarf hunter, and a level 12 orc shamen.  And the Pali and Hunter are in a guild with some people I know in real life.  And the characters are really awesome...

::hangs head::

This is my hunter Gexxe with her Snow Leopard pet Sidartha and her pet tree frog.  Because... we just do.  She has on her claws.  They're a weopon she can use because of her dual wield ability and.... I'll stop right there.


The score never interested me, only the game. - Mae West

You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play it better than anybody else. - Albert Einstein

On holidays

Holiday season has started.  We had the big meal where we carbo-loaded for the marathon of shopping, cooking, wrapping, and generally celebrating.

 

The "specialness" of the days, however, tend to grate on me.  Perhaps I didn't realize it until last year when I was seeing someone who "doesn't do presents," but I doubt that singular experiance was enough.  Combine the current economic downturn with a parent who puts so much pressure on gifting, between the time spent picking the gift and the amount spent on the gift and the quality of the wrapping (materials *and* skill) and you have a long-time-coming-gift-giving-rebellion.

 

And yet I'm still giving gifts this year.

 

But the one aspect that has become more pronounced is that Christmas is a day of obligatory gift giving.  Obligitory - when the gift is supposed to show how much you care about a person, that you think them special enough to get a gift on that day.

 

I give gifts randomly, I try to have something for people on their birthday, a token showing that I remembered the birthday and I know they like _blank_ (flowers normally, or wine, once i got a friend a gorgeous necklace).

 

I think my frustration is more obvious, pronounced, and defendable with the concept of Valentines day.  Morgan, it seems, is used to big fancy holidays.  For Christmas (and maybe this is my birthday combined too), he is taking me to get my hair done.  This is something I find truely desireable, as I have planned to get it done and it is so nice to not have to pay for it myself.  This weekend he brought up Valentines day.  He got to listen to a brief rant where I was annoyed at the concept of ignoring the state of a relationship the other 364 days of the year and only taking one day to "celebrate" it.

 

If I am in a relationship, I wish to feel recognized and important everyday.  Heck, I couldn't imagine a healthy relationship consisting of one member feeling unimportant most of the time.

 

And this is why holidays frustrate me.  Originally serving as an amplifier for a specific mood, they have metamorphisized into the only day we need to exhibit the appreciation.

 

 

 

 

Generosity is giving more than you can. Pride is taking less than you need" - Kahlil Gibran

 

If we have the opportunity to be generous with our hearts, orselves, we have no idea of the depth and breadth of love's reach. - Margaret Cho

 

 

 

 

 

Things That Make Me Happy

1. Candy-striped sunsets and the moment watching them.
2. The intense blue of a winter sky.
3. Kittens who cuddle even when I've been annoyed at them.
4. Hot showers.
5. So many friends who offered me their place before I "fixed" my hot water heater.
6. A boyfriend who lives close enough that we can see each other without planning it a days ahead of time.
7. A boyfriend who lives close enough that if I want to do something but he's tired, I can go out without feeling like a poor host.
8. Neighbors who come over to shoot the breeze and drink the wine.
9. Neighbors who are adventurous enough to help discover which bottles of wine went bad because of my poor wine rack location (final count: all 17).
10. Finishing a book.
11. Sunday morning snuggle sessions.


The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now. - Thich Nhat Hanh

The whole moon and the entire sky are reflected in one dewdrop on the grass. - Dogen

Let there be electricity through a metal coil that causes just enough resistance to radiate heat!

This is the second Kitten Story of the day, the first being of India's daring trip to the kitten emergancy room. He is recovering from a slightly embarrassing issue, but will be home and feeling better soon. Yay!

Last Saturday, an electrician came to my house to give me some estimates, 1) fixing what was broken 2) going from a fuse box to a circuit breaker. Before he showed up, I replaced all my fuses to everything that was broken, even though they looked like they were fine. None of the heaters worked, still. The hot water heater, however, did. So I did laundry and I took showers. I took a shower on Friday, and didn't use any hot water since. Then I took a shower today (monday) and I got just barely lukewarm water. I'm worried.

On Saturday my electrician came at 9AM to install my baseboard heaters. It seemed like an easy enough task, but the last time I did any electric work in my house (replacing the Kitchen Light Fixture and replacing the dimmer switch in the office with a simple on/off switch) I ended up with my laundry room light not working. So he came to replace 4 old, broken 8' baseboard heaters with 4 new, efficient 4' baseboard heaters and replace the bathroom light (Dave and I almost killed ourselves (possibly)) replacing it this summer), and figure out what was wrong with the laundry room light.

I was to provide my own materials, and I had 4 heaters and 4 thermostats. Except they weren't the thermostats that went with the heaters. Stupid Home Depot. So the electrician went and got the stuff. I then realized I never bought the new fixtures, so I ran to Home Depot (returning the crap stuff in the process). Just after this run, however, he went out to look at my fusebox, or his truck, or something, and I followed him to look at the snow. When I went back inside, I must not have closed the door all the way, because after I went over to tell Morgan about the snow (he was reading in my bedroom) I went back to the living room and saw the door open... and Orion was outside. So I grab her and realize I hadn't seen Neci in a while. I ask Morgan to look for her inside while I go outside to see if she's wandering.

Neither of us can find her, and the electrician tells me that I bought the wrong type of light fixture (I needed a pull chain), so I go back to Home Depot to buy the correct fixture (closest place to mine, even thought they screw up), delegating the entire cat hunt to Morgan. While driving I call my neighbor, knowing that if I don't the next day we'll have a conversation that consists of "Yesterday I saw a cat that looks just like Neci!" I'm starting to freak out, feeling like a horrible, irresponsible pet owner. When I adopted Neci I needed to fill out pages of references claiming that I had never lost a pet to neglect and could give the proper supervision and that she would ALWAYS be inside!

Then I start thinking about how Orion will feel. She has barely known any time alone since I adopted Neci. How will she handle it. And it's not like I can just substitute it with another cat, we'll both know it's not right, and I failed Orion. I'm ready to cry and am getting pissed off at my inability to care for another being when Morgan calls and says that he found Neci passed out under my bed.

The BITCH!

So now everything is ok.... except for my sudden lack of hot water. We'll work on that. The hot water heater was warm...

::sigh::

Media Dump

 

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Yay!!!






WANT!






Translation:
In 1994 Toby "arrived" at the McKenzie farm.
Incredibly, Sheila, an old duck, "adopted" him.
They had a beautiful relationship.
Some time later, Sheila died of old age...
So the McKenzies had her stuffed by a taxidermist.
This video shows Toby seeing Sheila again for the first time.

New Year Resolutions, sorta

I don't really *do* New Year Resolutions. It really makes no sense to me to suddenly decide that you need to change something and actually expect to break all your old, bad habits in one day that culminates the end of the stressful holiday season. Heck, the day after New Years is the national day of recuperation!

But, I do realize that I need to change a few things, and the next month will have plenty of new starts: new semester, new reign administration, new heating system.

So - I am going to propose a few changes to my current way of life. This is not seperate from the 101 in 1001 plan. In fact, it is most likely going to augment it. But I realize that I both need and want a few changes.

I've decided to break it into two parts: things I will continue through the year and things I want to get done over winter break.

So within the next month, I will set up the infrastructure for a year of:

1. Keeping my house as neat/clean as I did from April 2007 - Sept 2007.
2. Consuming consciously. This entails purchasing from local vendors and responsible companies. This includes food, toiletries, alcohol, cleaning supplies, and gifts.
3. Successfully gardening at least two food objects (ie: tomatoes and eggplants) and 3 spices/herbs.
4. Keep my bills organized.
5. Run http://gexxcooksknoxville.wordpress.com/ .

Over break I will:

1. Enroll in auto-pay for my mortgage
2. Figure out what is going on with my ATT bill
3. Clean my desk
4. Install my kitchen cabinet doors
5. Clean out my kitchen supplies
6. Install my coathooks
7. Play with my kittens
8. And generally simplify my possessions
9. Create my mother's website
10. Figure out my financial aid situation for the following year
11. Mount the headlight on my bicycle
12. Organize the basement for easy bicycle access
13. Get Orion and Neci their yearly shots
14. Spay Orion
15. Cuddle the kittens
16. and at the end.... update my 101 in 1001 blog!

Plan plan plan.... Now to just DO!